Tripping in Gujarat: Part Four

“Abey, I need to take a dump,” bemoaned Neil. As if through a very weird and gross cosmic connection, his bowel movement triggered an uneasiness in the rest of us too. We echoed, “Yes. Let’s stop somewhere.” We were on the way to Gir and pooping on the side of the road wasn’t acceptable to our cultured souls. Fortunately Raju bhai knew a petrol-pump restroom that was clean. It is at Jetpar, just before the left leading off NH8B that has to be taken. It’s clean. Fit even for ladies. Nelson used it.   

After we had concluded our business at the gas station, we made one more stop for tea and made our way to Sasan Gir. We caught some shut-eye in the car. We reached Sasan Gir by 3:30 am. We had an hour and half to kill before we could stand in queue to book our tickets. (You can do it online as well or be retro-cool like us.)

4:05 am – All of us, “You go stand in the queue. I’m sleeping.”

4:45 am – Raju bhai, “Snore!” 

                   Nelson and James, “ZZZZZ.”

Neil to Jenson, “Pattis. If we spot a lion we’ll throw those two out of the jeep.”

So as it transpired, Neil and Jenson stood in line for about an hour and half until the gates opened at 5:30 am after which they came and woke me up for a pen. A freakin’ pen! At that moment I wished I had a pen in my hand so I could stab Jenson in the eye and dance atop his sleep-disturbing black hole of an eye. But if there’s anything years of education have taught me, it is that one must not act on such whims. Groggily, I scavenged a pen from my backpack and accompanied Jenson to the counter.

Warning: If you’re sleepy, half awake, hungover or dislike loud noises, then stay away from the counter.

There’s a ‘mota bhai’ sitting on the other side of the counter yelling out guide names and etching the word ‘NEXT’ with his fingernails on a blackboard. Coupled with the shrill malfunctioning of the mic, his voice was the sole reason why lions never approached the booking office. To this day, I get nightmares in which my nightmares are driven away by that voice.

The pricing is as follows:

Rs 1200 for the Jeep + Rs 200 for the guide + Rs 400 for the entry permit = Rs 1800 + (Rs 100 if you wish to carry a ‘professional’ camera with you.) No charge for mobile phone cameras.

The cost is for 6 people. If you’re alone you can find an empty spot in a jeep and share the price or you can foot the bill alone.

Each jeep is allotted a particular route. We got our guide, driver and jeep and we began our quest to sight a lion along route 8. 

The excitement within us was palpable. We hadn’t slept properly in 22 hours, yet we were wide awake. Our eyes were peeled, scanning the forest for any movement. We couldn’t let the brown Earth camouflage our brown target.

Soon, we spotted a lion with white spots. Wait...what...that’s a deer, my brain realized. Apparently, I was still a bit groggy. We stopped to click photos of these tertiary tourist attractions. The ‘hardly ever spotted’ leopard is the secondary crowd-puller. There are monkeys too, but we had had enough of looking at each other.

We powered on, passing village settlements of the Siddi people (an African tribe). They seemed least interested in the passing jeeps. Looking at them made me wonder why did man move out of nature. But then my recidivist mind thought about air-conditioning, playstation, computers and other amenities which made me wonder, how they could be satisfied living in the forest. Perhaps Eden lies somewhere in between. But for now, technology RULES!

We reached the end of our path and we still hadn’t seen a lion. Our guide and driver kept assuring us that we would and that we still hadn’t reached the place where lions sprawl around on the ground right next to the path. 

Just as we turned the car around, it broke down. The jeep wouldn’t start. Our driver got off, opened the bonnet(hood) and bit a few wires but the jeep wouldn’t start. He decided to call for help. For that, he needed to get up high. The things we do for cellular coverage.

He ran into the forest and climbed up a tree as fast as a monkey. Years of practice from his car breaking down, we assumed. Yes, we were pissed off by this time. We hadn’t spotted a single lion and we were very tired and sleepy. Our guide instructed us to stay in the jeep. So naturally we got off to stretch our hands and legs. 

After a few photographs for posterity, our guide ‘shhhushhed’ us. He pretended to listen to something suggesting a lion was close by. Our driver climbed down the tree and came scampering towards us. He was pointing to a point behind us. Neil turned in that direction and saw……nothing. There was nothing. The driver continued his charade and ran in the direction. He came back saying, ‘I thought there was a lion there. But no.’ Ya don't say.

We took a different path on the way back. The drive is quite long. After a while of scorching the forest with our un-blinking eyes, we dozed off. Needless to say, we didn’t spot a single lion. Apparently our batch was the unlucky one. 

Most of my friends have seen lions in Gir. My friends…pfft.

This was the main Sassan Gir safari. Close by is the Devalia safari at which you are guaranteed to spot a lion. It seems they have enclosed a certain area (around 32 kms). However, Devalia is closed on Wednesdays, the day we were there. Karma is a bitch.

We were bitterly disappointed. We would have to settle for our cake without the icing. We sulked for an hour or so until we reached Somnath mandir with Raju bhai. Then we sulked some more. We trudged along drearily, not wanting to take off our shoes to enter the temple. We clicked a few snaps from the outside and then made our way back to Rajkot.

Raju bhai sensed our disappointment and took us to Sakkarbaug or the Junaghad zoo, which is also closed on Wednesdays. Thankfully, it was open since it was during the Shivratri week. The zoo has a variety of animals, not just deer and lions. Take a look.

But by the end of it, not even a lion running loose in the zoo could amuse us. We wanted nothing more than a bed..in an air-conditioned room…something to eat…and maybe a nice shower.

“Raju bhai, don’t stop. Full speed ahead to Rajkot,” we bellowed. We reached Rajkot by around 6:30 pm. We booked a room in Hotel Evershine. (AC room for 2 + 2 mattresses on the floor + breakfast = Rs 2300). It is at Lembda Chowk. The whole lane is full of decent hotels which aren’t too expensive. 

Thanks, Raju bhai

There are also many travel agents nearby. We booked our bus to Mumbai for the next evening.

In the night we went for a stroll. Shama suggested a place called the Grand Thakar for dinner. Walking distance from Lembda Chowk, it’s quite famous in Rajkot. The thali is Rs 190. We were very under dressed for the place but we were on holiday. Thus without giving a rat's arse, we went in anyway. 

As it turns out, they do not serve the thali for dinner. We ordered a few rotis and a paneer dish. The food is good and reasonably priced. We came back, slept, woke up late the next morning, bought some sweets and into the bus we climbed.

That was that. We were on our way back to Mumbai. It was an amazing week. Funnily enough, I remember all 7 days.

Ever since my Eurotrip, I have this urge to travel. The destination isn’t a concern as long as I’ve never been there before. I'm beginning to understand how travel changes you. I still can't explain it. Perhaps I will understand it better on a solo expedition. Soon. 

Right now, for those who ask 'why do you want to travel?', all I can say is I don't know. Why do you not?